Tuesday, September 28, 2010


I am concerned more of the time of the day(??!!) 1.16 am on my computer screen …Fan above is making all kinds of creaking sounds…But listening to Shiv Kumar Sharma’s Marwa raaga, is a great feeling of getting drained in the musical rain!!

Wait, …… I just closed my eyes and thought of “Night” .

Ahhh, Night !

The time where those who have been working hard all day go to rest, the lorry wallahs sit by the campfire and gossip, some working in call centers attending all those dirty calls of problems!

Soft giggles of lovers , water ripples on bank of river, the haunting sound of some unknown bird on a distant tree, vehicles speeding on the road, the screeching sound of the tyres on brakes, and laughs of a united friends gang on a cousin’s wedding, the sound of vessles at a party!

I would like to go for a long walk on such a night!

And that hard hitting feeling of being all alone in the world, feeling as if the only person awake!!!!

Eeew......... I'll better sleep now :)

Saturday, September 25, 2010


This way … 20 yards to the left from the corner of this road, you are almost there, I’m going over there, follow me.” His fingers pointed to the corner as he panted. His face was blood red. I thought he was mad at me for stopping him. But he was in such a hurry, he had no time to even think of showing any particular feeling towards me; he had come running probably from a very long distance. He also carried a heavy backpack and a huge bag in one of his hands.

He must be lucky” I thought “He must be having a lot of memories

I was standing there empty handed.

It’s getting late. Will you not come? I can’t wait longer, see how the queue is growing every second…

I wished, for a split of a second, our eyes would meet and he would understand all of me.

Alas… he turned, “I’m going …. Have a nice time” he shouted, as he raced, without even looking back!

I guess I wanted to stop him…

But… Everyone else were running towards the corner of the road! He should not miss it!

I took the pass in my hand… It was glittering despite the accumulated dust of long long years.

It is the ticket to a happier world, you’ll have no worry once you enter it… all you have to do is follow the rules and regulations of the world” somebody had handed the ticket to me in one of those low times of my youthful days.

I had flatly ignored it… Obviously… I never believed happiness is bound to any rules and regulations.

I stepped further...Empty handed…the pass tucked to my waistband…. I had memories too, but I had chosen to leave them behind, anyhow I had dreamt of a happier world, a new world, and so a new me, I dint find a reason to pack my past!

I saw it! It was a golden gate! Walls so high, fresh paints and the view beyond the gate was just awesome… Colors, colors and more colors. I saw people wandering about, everyone seemed happy, everyone smiled!!

The queue was now a maddened crowd… running, shouting, abusing at each other… each of them wanted to be at the other side of the gate, each of them wanted to be more happy!

And… I was going to be one among them. I closed my eyes to let it sink in… “I’ll be happier now on” I sighed!

The shouting, the madness seem to fade, people became silent once they stepped past the golden gate! It was now my turn! I was still closing my eyes. The guard shook me, he snatched my pass, and tucked a paper in my hand and gave me a paper bag.

Rule: ” the paper said “There’s no going back

I lifted my chin to thank him… “probably with a wide smile” What I saw was unusual, he had the widest smile and it was the weirdest smile.

I was inside the gate now, I opened the bag, it was a mask, a very stylish mask, and it had the widest smile I ever saw.

Then, I saw it.. Everyone there were smiling .. their masks smiled for them…

The impact of the shock was too cold to bear… nothing really happened to me….. Now, I had to wear the mask too

And the rule said “There’s no going back”!

Friday, September 17, 2010

After all, you did not break my heart

I didn’t know this evening would turn into a wonderful night with a crystal clear sky with shining diamonds and smooth pearls, and then they would start pouring down all of a sudden to soak me completely and trip off on my toes.

I’m not a goddess; oh, I’m not even a charming angel! Miracles never happen with me.

But then, I do not know how I saw you here. Here…. on my lap … Foraying my inner tranquility with those deep brown eyes. Were you here when my hands played on those strings? When I had closed my eyes in expectation of no one in particular but for a seamless beauty to manifest in front of me? Did you blow a sweet wind of love on my face which was partly hidden behind the flitting black hair?

But.... But….Can that be possible anyhow?

There is no light anywhere…. All the light beads have dripped off and flowed into the sea.. and I am not on the shore anymore…

I am drowning … Deep into the night…

Should I let myself drown? Or should I put my arms around your shoulders?